**Dont Judge Untill You Know Me**

I saw my new support worker for the first time yesterday,

she seems OK but will find out more if she does what she said she will.
 

Okay I think it is time to explain a little bit but I will say,
People can judge me all they want,
but only when they know me and know what I'm talking about.

 

Anyway where was I? oh yeah i see a support worker in a recovery agency as I

did have a drug addiction, nothing to be proud off and nothing I enjoyed,

but I did have a problem, I made a mistake of being curious and tried it

I wish I never but I did,

The first day I woke up ill and found out it was because I had a habit

was a nightmare. The first night I tried it I cried myself to sleep

so I don't understand or know why or how I ended up with a habit,

it winds me up just thinking about it but yeah..

anyway

The day I found out I was addicted I went straight to the recovery agency

to register and ask for a script so I can get off it.

I thought I would be able to get on a script straight away or

within a week or something like that,

boy was I wrong!!

I had to wait 5/6 months before I was on it

and during that time my habit got a lot worse more than what a lot

of peoples habits are that are addicted to the nasty stuff...

So I had to pay for it and to do that I had to get in trouble

I was shop lifting to feed my habit (which I did get arrested for)

But luckily for me with it being my first time in trouble I just walked away

with a caution, Well 3 cautions,
 that woke me up.
The day I got my script I was so happy

I dint understand it, it was amazing I can go to the chemist get given

these two little tablets, to dissolve under my tongue

(which literally tastes like a powdery tablet in your mouth but you cant swallow till they are all dissolved YUCK!!)

But they stop me being ill stop me needing that s**t.

 

After a while I knew I was beginning to be myself again, I did not look like a zombie ha ha

I still got a little way to go but its so good to be clean..
 

I don't really mind what people think as I use to think worse than what your thinking right now :)
Me and my fiancé are going to spend Christmas with family
I cant wait to go see them all its been while, the
last time I saw them was when I went down for my auntie Patsy's funeral
(R.I.P Pat Keep On Singing, Love You xXx)

So this time we are going down on a good note.. for Christmas!!
I have always spent Christmas with my family
the last 2 years I have not been able to go down for different reason
so I was determined that this year we are going
to see my family over Christmas...
To start of with my mother did not want us down for Christmas
moaning as normal saying she ain't doing Christmas this year (SCROOGE)
ha ha..
But only because she has not got a lot of money at the moment
but nor has anyone at the moment really
so I managed to talk her round :D
That's why I had to talk to my support worker to get my tablets
to take away over Christmas and she said it was fine thank god!!

I'm gonna go play bingo on the gala website for a little while :D
 so fingers crossed ha ha

might be back later :)

Take Care

xXx Leanne-Marie xXx